Saturday, November 29, 2008

What's that on your foot?

Thanksgiving at 54 Maidenhead.....

Mom: (looks over at Steven and sees a huge red gash) Oh my god, Steven! Did you cut your foot?

Steven: (looks down at foot confused, tests the gash by tasting it) No, that's just cranberry sauce.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Cafe Borgia! It's where we always go!

Today I spent time with 3 of my favorite human beings on the planet (behind my mom of course - and some other awesome people). Todd, Sonja and Jake. We worked together at a place that was 'more like Cambodia than you'd think' and formed a bond that I will forever be grateful for. These three people make me very, very happy - but mostly I'm thankful that I'm not nearly as ugly as Todd because that boy has one hideous mug.

Today we were walking along and we noticed a store across the street that was called "Big Bags". Todd said I should I go in and ask for the smallest bag they have. Sonja then nudges us all and goes "look, it's Chris Noth!" We turn and look and holy crap - there's Mr Big! Except he's looking surprisingly haggard... and hungry. If I'd had a sandwich, I would have handed it to him.

The four of us walk past him nonchalantly trying not to stare and also trying to find adjectives to describe his appearance when Todd says "Mr Big went to Mr Big Bags"

ahhhh....... awesome.

Later we were walking through soho trying to find a place to sit down for coffee - we're walking forever and finally I'm like, Todd, where are we going? And he says in his best bronx/Guido accent - "cafe Borgia! it's where we always go!"

I can't explain it except to say that we never go to cafe borgia.

A French guy sat down next to Sonja and asked her where to find the statue of the lady with ten pairs of boobs. He was French. He mentioned that he was French. I think we would have figured it out anyway.

Oh - and Jake knew where to find the multi-boob statue.

Sonja ordered tea but service in soho isn't always what you call A+.... she got the tea, but no water. (I suggested she simply suck on the bag)

Earlier in the day I was having a very special moment of realization when all that is wonderful in new york hit me like a train and I thought to myself, why in the world did I ever leave this place?

Five seconds later I hit a patch of ice and fell flat on my ass in the middle of fifth avenue.

I now have a giant swollen very ouchy bruise on my elbow.... oh lady manhattan, you wretched evil whore.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

made em cry

I keep a tally at work of the people that I make cry.

Not in the mean way like I punched them in the face or I called them slutty trannies.

It's on a blue post-it and it refers to someone crying either during an on-camera interview or if they cry during showings of videos I've produced. I'm very proud of that tally. It means I moved someone or I helped someone reach an intense place. If someone cries on me, it's my own personal gold star.

....Today I made someone blush though and let me tell ya - that was just as fun! Normally it's pretty easy to shock and surprise people at work ... ok, well, basically I open my mouth here and I shock and surprise. But blush? That's not a normal reaction for me. Since, ya know - I'm so innocent and sweet and shy and all.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Things I feel ok about.

I stole a banana from the cafeteria today and I feel ok about that.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Running towards beer

Anything that ends with beer is pretty much guaranteed to be a good time. Especially coupled with the words "micro-brew" and "lasagna". (doesn't lasagna end with an 'e'?? Why is spell checker hating on me and telling me to end it with an 'a'? Screw you spell checker, except not really because I prefer to spell good)

Yesterday I went to boot camp in the morning; it was a 90 minute-er so I was prepped to get my butt kicked well and good and then spend the rest of the day recovering. As I'm dragging my very heavy backback from my car (did you know that putting weights in a backpack make it REALLY REALLY heavy? yea - weird) Sandi's husband Travis begins to taunt me by telling me about the race they're doing today and how if I did it, I would probably 'accidentally' do the half marathon (reference) HA. HA. HA. soooooo funny.

But then he said the magic words. BEER and LASAGNA. (ok, seriously - lasagna is a very difficult word to spell. Haven't gotten it right yet.)

I was in.

Ok, but on the reals - I was totally convinced after the mild taunting.

Damn me! So easily influenced!

The run pre and post activities were very fun - the run itself was completely miserable. 4.3 miles (a 1/6th barrel, marathon, ahh, so many meanings my head hurts - just tell me when the damn thing is over!!!!) Seeing as how I normally run 5 miles (when I actually run which lately hasn't been too often) and how 2 weeks ago I managed to complete a 15k, I should have been able to at least gracefully finish. Maybe not SMOKE the course, but at least look pretty at the end. Um, no. There is no looking pretty. There was discussion after the race that if only your running pants could at least TELL you that you look pretty - how awesome would that be? Can you imagine, you're huffing and puffing as you reach the 3/4 point in a run and from below your knees comes a sing song voice saying "oooh stacey, your hair has such a delicate golden glow today." Wouldn't that just feel amazing?


It was freezing, it was raining, it was windy, it was in Lake Mills.

Oh - and I had also done boot camp in the morning. I guess that made me tired? DUH. I swear to god - I've gotten a little dumb since moving to wisconsin. I guess not having to daily fend for my life by dodging taxis, homeless people, messengers, crappy bosses and rats has made me a bit slower.

But then the race was finally over and yay!!!! Warm tent! Beer! Lasagna dinner! Super awesome people! The running community is a new one to me and I have to say I totally get why people get addicted - the run is a high, but omg - the people freaking rock! It's like getting a gift and then another gift! Or - if you're AIG, it's like getting bailed out and then bailed out again!

(that Alanis Morrisette song just popped in my head for some reason - it's like Raaaii-ee-ain on your wedd-eeeee-ing day. It's a freee-eeeeee riii-ide and you've already paid.) Except that my point was not like that at all. totally different.

My point - I sort of love running now.

Thanks for the taunting!!

Monday, November 3, 2008

things that confuse me

#23 on the list of things that confuse me are adults that carry rolling backpacks to work.

You know - I see these people get out of their cars parked all of a block away from the front door at work, they pull their little wheeled bags out of their cars and then roll them into work and up the escalator and then into the elevator and then down the hall, all 15 steps. What in the world could you possibly be carrying in that bag? 14 twenty pound weights? A set of Brittanica Encyclopedias? A fat midget? My favorite is seeing the bags get twisted and don't roll properly and they tussle with the bag because it's so dang light it can't even roll properly.

Lazy sacks.